Story Pokemon Storyline, Tell me what you think

[Giligis]

This is for Johto Showdown and once its finished will literally spoil every single event to happen in the main quest/storyline, so , just letting you know. Writing it out how it goes along in the game. Tell me what you think so far, this is just before the 1st badge. Below is a summed up version of the final piece will look like.

Small Synopsis

You get your starter, your dad passes away you get another starter, Meet Lance, go to the hospital found out Dad died from electric currents, and basically you find out Lance is the one who killed your dad out of jealousy and spite, and you rise up to defeat him. More to it than that, but basically. Your dad uses the electricity in his body and the powerplant from the next town over to take form in his last pokemon (in the story, you take one, professor takes one, the last one no one took is this form that your dad comes back in, as a Pokemon. Basically what I got for now, I have alot more but it takes alot to get into.

Storyline

The sun has been out all day, shining on all the beautiful tree tops. Located in a small town called "New Garden" was a hero whos adventure was about to unfold..

"Hunny, its time to wake up! You know your dad and the Professor have important matters to take care of today! Don't let me down." Slowly, but surely, you slide out of bed. You get your gear on to start your journey that you have no idea is about to start. The professors lab isn't very far from your house, its next to you on the left, a short walk still leaves you tired, and panting. Wow, I'm out of shape. Before you open the door to the lab you see your reflection in the glass, Wow, not only am I out of shape, I look so much like Dad you think. You open the door the squeaks and slams behind you. Around you, lab aids are running around researching data and frantically conducting experiments. Professor Teak is in the distance, near his desk. 

"Ahh, you've finally cared to arrive, have you? Nonetheless, we have much to speak about. You know every year they host the Johto Showdown, and soon enough they will be taking in new challengers, with the history your dad has, we're hoping you too can live a life of legacy! Now I have three Pokemon here for you to choose, Cyndaquil, the fire Pokemon, Chikorita, the grass Pokemon, or Totodile, the water Pokemon. Choose Wisely, once you chosen, let your mom know your going on a journey. I'll need you to go the next town, called "Tulip Town". There will be a package that will further assist you on your journey, bring it back to me and we can take it from there!"

Onto "Tulip Town", you set off. The road is long and tiresome, but your first Pokemon battle was awesome, and a total adrenaline rush! You make it to the Mart just in time before close, to pick up the package. The man at the counter lets me know to be careful, and to not damage the contents of the package. You arrive back at the lab and Professor Teak seems to be very upset.

"what's the matter?" You ask, Professor Teak has his back to you, and after many seconds still has no reply. 

"You brought the package, yes?" he asks.

"I did." You reply.

"May I see, it please?" he asks, and you hand him the package.

"You see, I hate to be the one to break it to you..but your fathers, he's..very sick. He's in the hospital and he's sent over these 3 Pokemon. They aren't much, but it was the three he cared most about, he told you to pick one! Inside these balls are Ralts the Physic Pokemon, Pikachu the Electric Pokemon, and Eevee, the Normal type Pokemon. He can't bear to lose all 3, so, I'll be taking one for myself as well, and your father will be left with one."

You choose one of your father's renowned Pokemon.

"Your father's located in the Hospital in Perennial City. He said he would like to have a word with you. Its rather urgent. Perennial City is the next town over, after Tulip Town. Be careful walking through Route 2, there are Pokemon trainers looking for battles, so be weary, or ready. Your choice."

With that, You and Professor Teak shake hands, and your worrisome journey to Perennial City begins. The Route isn't so bad, its filled with Pokemon of all shapes and sizes and the learning curve is helping me become a better trainer! I finally made it to the end of the route, and I'm stopped by a strange man.

"Hello, I don't mean to frighten you. My name is Lance, and until your father became the next big hit, I was the Champion of Johto Showdown. The Showdown League told me about the news, that your father is very sick. I came here to give him my condolences. You look so much like your father it amazes me, maybe one day YOU too can be the Johto Showdown Champion." Lance takes a quick glance at his watch. 

"It's getting rather late, lets get going. Your fathers on the 2nd floor. I'll meet you at the hospital once everything's said and done."

The Hospital is located not too far away from the Pokemon Center and the PokeMart, the building is rather large compared to the rest of the buildings around it. Again, you see your reflection in the door, and it almost shocks you as much as it did Lance. You continue upstairs to the 2nd floor. For some reason there seems to be lots of commotion..An uneasy feeling settles into your stomach. You also notice that Lance is nowhere to be found..You look around and find the door marked "The Johto Champion", outside the door are 2 doctors, and a nurse, obviously talking quiet to keep something from me. The door to my Fathers room was locked, and I instantly turned to the doctors and nurse who frantically distracted themselves in nearby things. 

"Why is it locked?" You asked. "What is going on?".

The doctor first looks to the floor, then up into your eyes.

"Your Father has passed away, YOURNAMEHERE. I am so sorry. There was nothing we could do. We was in ventricular fibrillation, or in other words, electric currents passed through his heart, stopping his heartbeat. We have no idea what could have caused this, and we kept such a close eye on him."

You start to cry, and try desperately to hold back the tears. 

"He gave me this letter, its for you. I think you should open it, he said it was very important. Again, I'm so sorry." The Doctor handed over the letter and began walking back to his office.